Restart my self for next week

This weekend I have almost only just been sleeping! And I’m not that person who sleep a lot at all! Well maybe it’s because I had the flu and not 100% fit for fight from it. Today I visit my grand mothers mother and had lunch with her and my parents and after that went home and just laying here half dead. Looking at Grease and flipping around with my phone and surfing. Pretty comfy but on the other way I’m tired and bored hahaha! 

But I have find little inspiration to do some DIY projects and paint some of my furniture and so on. Pinterest is an amazing and dangerous app. I have found so many awesome DIY projects I want to do. Not just home decor and so but even clothes from the 1930’s era and the 1940’s! 

Lately I have been a huge fan of the 30’s-40’s style its something special with it. I do love the 50’s,but those to other eras inspire me to a lot. Well I think it’s time to start with all my DIY projects who have been banned to a box for the last year and pick up the things and let the magic begins in this boring and really grey January without snow!!

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Thinking about stuff

At the moment i don´t know whats up or down right now. And I don´t think the seson know if it´s autumn or spring. The last days it´s have been like a grey november and a rainy one to! My mood is in the same grey as outside my window. I have problem to understand that I´m lonely,I don´t have some one home.And when I get home I don´t have some one who is playing music or a game on the computer. I´don´t have some one to talk to or hug when I get home. My home feels like a shoebox and it´s not my home! It´s my stuff and my table but when I walk in it´s not feels like my home. So to ignore I have been sleeping on the couch home and at my best friend/my parent and have not been home for many night since that day I don´t want to remember. For the last three rainy and grey days I have been in the apartment that is my so called home, and guys it´s like a hell. I don´t want to be there!

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But to day I will try for the first time in weeks take all the boxes with stuff and put them into a place. After that I will put my hair up in pincurls. Tomorrow I want to have nice curls or if it´s stil rainy and grey a nice hairdo and a hat on my head! In the middle of this depresed me I can´t look like a hobo or a borring person that just get heart broken….So it´s better to look like a moviestar from old hollywood or like a doll.

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Even if he will find a new and share his life with her I know one thing. I made a tatto in his mind and heart. I will always have a place that he can´t ignore or remove. He will keep looking for some parts of me in the other one but he won´t find the pices. Beacuse I´m who I´m and nothing can change it and of course I´m once in a life time women. I will always love him even if I want to hate him I can´t. I can´t beacuse I love him and only wish him good things. Right know I don´t want him to flirt or look at other girls but mayby after a year i can wish him luck to find some one but for now hell no.

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But for know I will pretend that I´m all okay and the best revenge is to look good! 😉